Sunday, May 22, 2011

A Bi-Polar Weekend

This has been some of the strangest 48 hours of my life.

The previous Thursday and Friday were difficult ones for me. Others had felt the strange vibe building around those days, with unusual weather and unusual events. Saturday morning and afternoon was absolutely bizarre, with my attempts at study completely thwarted by the anticipation of a bit event that evening. That event in itself was ridiculous, moving from the absolute dejection to absolute jubilation in the space of two hours. Following that was a party that married a huge celebration with unfortunate issues bubbling to the surface. This morning was a hang over, followed by very kind words from friends (and even some freshly baked cake from one of them!) and a fixing of the issues of the night before.

A few hours ago I finally slowed down a little bit and felt the weight of the weekend hit me. If you will pardon my language, it was an emotional shit-storm. My mood was rocketing from one extreme to another at a seemingly dangerous rate. Thankfully I was aware of this whilst undergoing the oscillation and barring the end of last night which was subsequently addressed, I managed to maintain a good level of control.

The key seems to be ensuring that when I am on a high, I understand that it does not make me invincible and when I am a low, it is a temporary one that I will be able to weather. The weekend was marked by extremes where I am afraid that I lost sight of these issues. But by and large, by keeping them at the forefront of my mind I got through the weekend and am able to look back on it as an excellent one.

Perhaps I can begin to embody this sensibility without it being at the forefront of my mind and thus find some level ground.

-The English Student

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